For 2026, let us make an effort to make the ancient teachings extraordinarily accessible in a very short amount of time.
First, we admit that some people are not receptive to self help. They are going to do things their own way, and it might work out for them, so it is not my place to judge and it is not yours either. But for you and me, let us simplify and find a way to improve ourselves.
Start with the understanding that we have two sides to our personality. Within those structures you might say there are other personalities that could be examined as well, but for the sake of simplicity, there are two primary parts of the self.
The first is the anxiety self. That is the self that is triggered and reacting. If there were a way to measure in real time what was happening, you would likely see an elevated heart rate and a less preferential part of the brain running the show, one that is reactionary, probably not very rational, probably lacking compassion. The breathing pattern changes and so do our thought processes. In that state we tend to focus on negative things, because we are trying to correct something, or something is not right, or it is simply a habit and a pattern.
The second is the relaxed self, or the observer self, as it really should be framed. This is the self that recognizes we are anxious, recognizes we are falling into negative thought, and then stops it. It redirects the mind back toward something relaxing.
The way to achieve that ability is nothing less than practice, and the first job is knowing what the practice actually is. We practice in everything we are doing. Notice at any moment where the thoughts are drifting, what is occupying the mind right now, where the breath is, whether we are breathing well or holding it. We also scan the body for trigger points. Are we hungry. Are we lonely. Are we tired. Do we have to go to the bathroom. Is our back hurting. Do we need exercise. Are we hot. Are we cold. All of these things affect which side of ourselves we are likely to be in.
You might say that meditation is more of a testing ground than a practice. Sure it is a practice, but is that really the right word. Practice suggests it is not real life, and it is real life. It is more like a flight simulator. In our meditation, or yoga, or tai chi, or any kind of exercise, or anything really, we test our ability to stay focused and present.
So what happens when the class is over and we go back into life. Did we stop practicing. Are we in something different now. No. We are still in it if we make that decision and stay aware of it. The breathing continues. The noticing continues. But when we are doing things, our attention shifts to the things we are doing. When we are walking down the street, we are not daydreaming about the Himalayas or thinking about a yoga posture and how to perfect it. We are thinking about crossing the street. We are watching the light change. We are paying attention to traffic and bikes and people. We can do all of that mindfully, and observe where the mind goes while we do it.
We usually get swept away by the distraction of the ten thousand things, all there is to see, all the noises, all the sensations, everything we remember about our lives. These are all worth noticing, but not worth being consumed by. Do not become attached. Attachment means you stick to a thought process that pulls you out of relaxation. How do you avoid that. You practice. You practice redirecting the mind and coming back. I can do it when I look at the sun through the clouds and close my eyes. I can do it when I am breathing fresh air in the forest. I can do it in the yoga classroom. I struggle to do it where the conditions are uncomfortable, so I keep working.
The most difficult place to practice awareness and breathing is inside our relationships with people. Our children can trigger us in such a way that we tense up and react. So can our partners, our business associates, the police officer who pulls us over. In that arena the testing ground is even harder, because now someone else is acting and we are trained to react.
So what do we do when someone is acting on us. Nothing fast. The reaction is already moving before we notice it, so the work is to catch it one second later than we would like, feel that the breath has stopped, and let it start again. That is the whole move. We are not trying to be calm. We are trying to be awake while we are not calm. Sometimes we will handle it well and sometimes we will handle it badly, and both outcomes are information. The person in front of us is not the obstacle to the practice. They are the practice.
That is the short version of the ancient teachings, and it really is short. Two selves. Notice which one is running. Come back to the breath. Do it again tomorrow. The traditions spent thousands of years describing this in a hundred different vocabularies, and every one of them arrives at the same small act, repeated for a lifetime. There is nothing to buy and nothing to believe. You can start it in the next breath, and that is the only place it has ever been available to start.