Many modern relationships falter because the participants cannot manage their anxieties and return to a state of relaxation. Relaxation is essential for humans to access their higher consciousness. In anxiety, we revert to our lower consciousness—reactive, impatient, wounded, childlike, greedy, desperate, unloving, and destructive. The concept of anxiety as a common human issue resonates with everyone, for we are all born with some version of anxiety mechanisms. Various factors can trigger our anxiety, and romantic partners uniquely access certain emotional buttons.
Our partners can reach into the hidden compartments of our childhood wounds. This intricate mental process is so prevalent that evolution must have deemed it necessary for the union of two people to reveal each other's vulnerabilities. Perhaps it is designed this way because healing these wounds benefits both the individual and the species. This profound concept underscores the significance of relationships. In relationships, we can confront every character flaw developed since childhood, vibrating with unresolved energies trapped in the body.
In the book, Relationships*, I will expound on my personal philosophies, informed by my experiences and the teachings of many great masters. I will also include practical methodologies to encourage action rather than mere contemplation.
I am old-school in my approach to self-work. The primary tools are:
- Self-awareness
- Rigorous honesty with oneself and others
- Reading and learning from ancient philosophers on consciousness, human character, and the universe
- The practice of non-harm
- Writing and journaling
- Verbal communication
- Companionship and touch
- Laughter and learning
- Connecting with nature
- Aligning with a healthy diet and disciplined exercise
- Service to others
- Deep breathing exercises with focused intention
- Keeping your house in order
- Redirecting negative emotions
- Following daily regimens
- Avoiding vanity and excessive pride
- Not judging others harshly, as they are a reflection of your mind
- Recognizing and breathing through anxiety
- Listening to pleasant music, inhaling soothing scents, enjoying beautiful natural sights, and appreciating art and architecture
- Sharing your discoveries with the world without attachment
- Make to do lists, and follow through
This list could go on indefinitely. These practices came to me during meditation, and I noted them down. While I know this list is incomplete, I leave it to you to continue and expand upon it.
"Relationships" is a book I have been working on for 39 years. It will be completed by January 2025, and I am making chapters available on the goodsugar website.